It’s Merdeka = Freedom, Day! Freedom to choose, oh YES YES YES !!!! Evelyn’s Eyes snap open waaaaaay before sunrise to the mental pictures of the fascinating patterns of a kaleidoscope. The colored pieces fall according to the twists of the hands controlling the cylinder into intricate, multicolored patterns that can be changed at will. The image prompts waterfalls of rainbow thoughts darting into each other, fusing and harmonizing in the seductive darkness of pre-dawn – my favorite time of day.
Ted Kennedy twisted his cylinder to overcome his demons and embrace patterns of fullness, MJ twisted his cylinder to empower his demons to overcome him while still producing brilliant patterns for others to enjoy. Both were great men who have left lasting legacies of Good in their destined spheres, by choosing to embrace their potentials – each with his own methods of choice. One stretched life to as many years as he could, while the other allowed it to spin out of control into a downward spiral. Both squeezed every ounce of opportunity they could to influence millions and millions of people and provide positive relief and release. Power to them both! I want too!
And I, am awake to the myriad possibilities that the days ahead present to me and my ghosts, as nationalists, as friends, as lovers of life and pursuers of destiny / fate / pre-ordination; call it what you will. How excruciating to my heartstrings that though the outcomes might be ordained, the methods are ours to choose. NOOOOO! screams my thirsty soul, this Merdeka / Freedom Day. Must I choose instead of flow? Arghhh! For the common good, numerous parties, parades etc have been downsized to reduce the spread of the rampaging H1N1 virus. It’s been the postponement of pleasure and celebrations for later; when the virus has been thwarted or just mitigated even, so that joy can be fuller and more. The Ted Kennedy approach, indeed :)
But what choice patterns do the ghosts History (Soothing Blue), Almost Past (Growth Green) and Present (Defiant Vermillion) tempt me to twist and form through my kaleidoscope? History has materialized from nowhere – I thought he’d been laid to rest, but no. Despite my clear rejections, History had quite obviously not allowed the years to erase me from memory and had even diligently searched for my new location, appearing in the 21st century with declarations that reassure me of my inherent value. His letters assure me of the core of my identity and ground me in them. Almost Past has remained consistent – steadfast, loyal, anticipating my needs, encouraging, championing my causes, and speaking truths that consolidate my values. His faithful friendship and companionship have allowed me to grow verdantly and vibrantly. My kaleidoscopes’ blues and greens simply MUST be sustained if I want to achieve a legacy of greater, eventual good.
And what are the contributions of the multiple ghosts comprising my Present? That Defiant Vermillion of turbulence, calm, viruses, vision, stabs, laughter, toxin, balm – promises of absolutely nothing at all EXCEPT the results of how I choose to twist the cylinder of my kaleidoscope to mix and match the colored pieces. Interspersed through vermillion's palette are fragments of sensible yellow, cheeky orange, fun carmine, passionate scarlet, intoxicating rose, seductive claret, & heady port. Will a Ted Kennedy or an MJ emerge from the match that I mix? Can I derive a Lifeline of dependable, Pulsating Red?
And tomorrow brings September: my birth month which is named as the 7th month, the number biblically associated with fullness of purpose (7 days etc). It dawns with the promise of cyclical completion of what remains yet in motion. IF I twist the kaleidoscope wisely, the pattern will be a satisfying one sans the ravages of toxic elements in my life. Who and what are good for me?
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